What The Hell Are They Thinking??

Okay, I've got a little love/hate thing going on with remakes or reimaginings or whatever the hell you want to call them. Some of them are actually good, like the first Texas Chainsaw remake or the first Hills Have Eyes remake. But, most turn into something that the cat dragged in, like the Amityville Horror remake or the Black Christmas remake! Now, I hear about a couple of new remakes on the horizon and I just about swallowed my tongue in anger!!!

The Wolfman - This is one of my favorite all time Universal monster movies. Lon Chaney Jr. embodied this character and the now cheesy looking effects that were cutting edge in their day, just add to the charm and horror of this movie. Now, I hear that it's being remade starring Benicio Del Toro in the Chaney part! What the hell is wrong with people?!?! First, Del Toro couldn't act his way out of a paper bag. Second, why do we need to remake this classic movie, just invent your own damn werewolf movie...everyone else does!!

Escape From New York - This classic John Carpenter movie still stands up today, in fact, I just watched it a couple of weeks ago and enjoyed it as much as I did the first time I saw it at the drive in! Why do we need to remake this movie?? Just because the original is a beloved classic movie? Well, how about getting an original idea? And now I'm reading that Gerard Butler is going to play Snake Plissken! First, Snake is American, not Scottish! And second, if Kurt Russell isn't in it, I ain't seeing it!! Leave this movie alone, hire a writer and make up your own action movie!!

The Creature From The Black Lagoon - Now, while the original creature really isn't one of my favorite Universal movies, I can see why it's a classic. The effects were amazing for it's time, even though the story is really just Beauty and the Beast set underwater, there's still something about this movie that sets it apart from the pack, it's not just another creature feature, there's something more going on here that adds it's own charm to this movie. So, why would we need an updated version of this movie? Because we can now do cool effects with our computers? Well, that's not really a reason, guys! I have two words for anyone who wants to make a digital Creature From The Black Lagoon...King Kong!

Here's the bottom line on this...as far as I'm concerned...why not get an original idea? You want to make an action movie, then get out there and write one, there has to be dozens of great action scripts out there just dying to be made! And if you want to make a horror movie then find an original concept and make it! Every month I see at least five new original horror movies that are far better than a thousand Hills Have Eyes 2! So, filmmakers, it's on you, you like that old movie, then write a movie like it, don't just buy the title and remake it because you have no other ideas! And studios, just because the title is one that people love, doesn't mean that we'll run to the theatre to see the crappy remake, we like original stuff too!!!

Now, get out there and entertain us!